My name is Lucy Telfer, and welcome to my blog, Lucy’s Love of Food. I’m so delighted you’ve found my page, and I really hope it might inspire you towards a healthier and, (more importantly), happier way of life.
To give you an idea of what lies at the heart of what I do…this blog was born out of my own battle with an eating disorder. It was something I tried to ignore for a long time, convincing myself that if I pretended it wasn’t there, it would eventually go away. But, not surprisingly, this didn’t work, and it got far worse than I ever imagined it would. In the end, I sought out professional help. I saw a mental health nurse, who diagnosed me as anorexic, and referred me to an eating disorder clinic. This was terrifying for me, but I was also so relieved – these were the people who would help this go away. But when I had my assessment at the E.D. clinic, I was turned away. Even though I was rapidly losing weight and my situation was described as “dire”, I was told that, unfortunately, I did not meet the criteria for treatment. My BMI was slightly too high. I couldn’t get any help.
I felt completely lost. This mental illness had such a tight hold of me, and complete control over my life. I didn’t see any way I could get rid of it without professional help, and the only scenario I could imagine was spiraling more and more out of control, and it never stopping. I was completely obsessed with the idea that the only option was to lose much more weight, because then they would help me. I wanted to give in to it, because I didn’t think it would be possible to get better.
If this sounds at all familiar to you…I am just so happy you’re reading this!
It was then that something occurred to me. I remembered the nurse saying “I’m so sorry, I’m put in this situation all the time where I have to tell people they can’t have help, even though they need it.” I didn’t feel angry – I know their resources are hugely stretched, and there are people far worse off than me who need the help first. But I suddenly realized that there must be so many people like me, teetering on the edge of a serious illness, left floundering and lost. What happens to us? It occurred to me that so many people must, like I did, think they should just continue down the path they’re on, getting worse and worse, because there isn’t another option. And it made me want to do something about it.
At first, I did allow those thoughts to win. I did get much worse, lost a lot more weight, and since then have been taken on as an “out-patient” (meaning I don’t have to be kept in hospital), by an eating disorder therapist. I’ve begun my treatment, and have started making great changes with the wonderful doctor I am very fortunate to have.
I realized I had to make a decision. I could either take the easy option, and carry on as I was. Or I could choose to change. If I’m truly the only person who can save my body, then I was going to have to do it myself. Suddenly, knowing that there was no other option, I felt full of determination. This was my responsibility, and I had to stop waiting for the help to come from somewhere else. I wanted to be healthy, happy and glowing again. And I was going to get there. Because I’m worth it. And so are you.
I want my blog to be accessible to absolutely anyone. But if you relate to my story in any way, or are suffering with eating issues of any kind, then please know that this is here for you. If you are feeling lost and don’t know where to turn for help, I want you to know you are not alone. There are so many suffering in silence who, to look at, you may never know had an eating disorder. This blog is here to support those people, and inspire anyone else towards a healthier, happier attitude towards food.
All my issues came from a huge passion for food. Before all this started, I ate anything and everything I wanted, and never thought twice about it. Yes, it was a love of good food and healthy living – but the key was I had BALANCE. And that was what I needed back. Days when I exercised because I enjoyed it and it made me feel good, not to punish myself for something I’d eaten. Days when I could order whatever I wanted off a dinner menu, and not order a salad even though I wanted pizza because some stupid voice was telling me I had to. Being able to eat an almond croissant and loving every bite! This blog may be based around nutritious, health food – but this is about falling in love with food again, not following strict rules. And DEFINITELY not any form of diet. And BALANCE. Yes, you’ll find delicious salads and raw brownies here. Because they’re yummy and really good for you. But you’ll also find steak. And sausage and mash. And cake. REAL cake. Because do you know what? A little bit of what you fancy is even better for you than quinoa. And you are allowed. You don’t have to earn it, and you certainly don’t have to punish yourself for it. Just keep that balance, and do whatever the hell you want. I want you to fall back in love with all those foods you miss so much and think you’re not allowed anymore. Trust me, you’ll be so much bloody happier!
I sincerely hope this blog can bring you happiness in some way. Feel free to get in contact with me if you have any questions, I’d love to hear from you. Just remember – you are not alone. You are strong enough to get better. And, most importantly…
YOU DON’T EARN GOOD FOOD. YOU DESERVE GOOD FOOD.
Love Lucy x